Resignation.

Chasing your dreams is exhausting and emotionally draining. It costs a lot. For me, it costs me my full time job.

I just finished writing my resignation letter. It wasn't a generic one like most exiting employees would probably write. Mine was very detailed. I made sure that whoever reads it, they would understand why I left the job.

I should be very sad right now. I won't have a steady flow of income anymore starting next month. I'm still struggling financially so this news should've been heartbreaking. Surprisingly, it wasn't.

I'm still concerned about where I'm going to get money to pay my bills. I don't have a new company to transfer to. How am I going to survive?

However, writing that resignation letter made me proud of myself. I felt so decided to leave. It's as if it wasn't me writing it.

I'm very indecisive so the fact that I was able to decide that I'm quitting my job there without any hesitations at all is a great development. It means that I have really thought it over.

Lord,

I'm talking to You again to let You know of this new challenge that I'm facing. Was this a punishment for my rude behavior towards my loved ones a couple of days ago? 

My future looks all the more blurry now that I don't have a full time job. But, I trust Your plans. I will trust Your beautiful plans for me.

Amen.

Big Boss

At work, I've been feeling a little down. I no longer have the same enthusiasm as I had a couple of months ago. I probably lost it because of my colleagues. I realized that they're not the same people I thought they were. Their real personalities have started to show now. Or, probably it's just the typical office politics and I'm just not into playing it. I can't stand people who treat you nice when you're together but are doing exactly the opposite when you're not around.

Earlier this morning, I learned that my big boss, the very person that I look up to and would really like to be my mentor, is leaving. He's now rendering his last thirty days in the office. I was so shocked. I thought it was just an early April Fool's joke. I don't know. I just really didn't see this coming.

He's migrating to Australia along with his family. It wasn't really about our company. It was more of a personal decision. He doesn't have any grudges against our company. As a matter of fact, he's giving us tips on how to survive on our own like dealing with certain executives. So, why am I so affected?

I've been thinking about resigning too. Like him, it wasn't about the company. Resignation is a personal choice, yes, but this was triggered because of the people around me. I felt like I don't belong to this group anymore. I wanted to stay but my personality just doesn't jive with the rest of our team.

Anyway, my big boss' resignation made me realize that nothing is really constant. He's able to establish himself in the company. He's already good. He's being respected by everyone and remained down to earth. He knows how to handle our team. I really didn't find any signs that he'd soon leave us. But, then again, there are people who know how to keep a secret. He's one of them.

I'm not sad nor heartbroken like this post may sound like. I'm confused. If he who seemed so happy with his current position is resigning, should I do the same? How come he's able to manage this plan without giving us a single clue that he's leaving soon? How can I do that too?

Lord,

I know You have Your plans for all of us. You can see everything. You are in control of everything. This might further confuse me but I believe that this is part of Your greater plan. 

Help me to be patient so I can wait for no matter how long it would take me to realize the beauty of Your plans. 

Continue to bless my big boss all the blessings that he deserves. He's such a good guy. Help him to inspire more people like me to do good in our chosen careers. 

Amen.